Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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