she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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