last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
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You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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