ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
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I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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