i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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