Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
everyone is single if you try hard enough
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You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
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Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize