i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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