There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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