I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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