Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize