I bet he comes in French.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize