And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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