Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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