Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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