At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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