just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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