did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize