So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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