What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
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Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
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I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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