when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
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