Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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