This girl is more easily done than said...
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I need to sanitize my soul.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
