dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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