this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize