Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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