...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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