I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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