M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The power of my boobs compel you
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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