PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize