I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize