I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
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