FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize