Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
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