btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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