If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize