I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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