things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize