Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize