i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I wish you could order shots online.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
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