Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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