i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize