I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
two words: eviction party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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