FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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