she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
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