There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
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so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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