fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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