How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I smell like Dick and happiness
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