whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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