i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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