Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize