Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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